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Author: Agul

[Idea] Pride

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Post time 22-2-2008 05:25 PM | Show all posts

Reply #18 my-alja's post

hmmm....i try....if im wrong....correctkan yer...

saya rasa saya tidak betul2 memikirkan istilah yg sesuai, sebab tu nampak pelik tuh

okeylah...

example: (pride that being judge by people....)

menegakkan benang yg basah.....ada orang yg fikir, biar salah, asalkan ku melawan..

atau org yg self-centered....selalu fikir diri hebat...padahal tak fikir akan kebenaran....

pride that being  judge by God...;

bangga dgn apa sahaja perkara yg benar yg kita buat....kdg2 terpaksa cipta perasaan bangga tu sendiri kerana kebanyakkan kebenaran itu pahit....

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Post time 22-2-2008 05:40 PM | Show all posts
Originally posted by mbhcsf at 22-2-2008 04:55 PM
pride and how does a pride of a person would affect his judgment on other people's prejudice? hmmm....or his/ wn prejudice...


well..Agul dear boy, where are u ? cares to chip in?


ermm....kenapa kita fokuskan pride yg hanya drp negatif side of emotion?

kalo tgk driver2 bas kat europe...they take a pride of being a driver, and they present themselves as a professional in the feild....ok tak?

pride (negatif) n prejudice nie timbul i rasa...bila dia prejudice dgn org, contohnya... dia fikir "org nie mesti ingat aku nie sapa-sapa saja(tak tahu dia terror)"...then baru dia mula menampakkan " ke terror an" dia....
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Post time 22-2-2008 06:27 PM | Show all posts

eh ni....

bangga dgn apa sahaja perkara yg benar yg kita buat....kdg2 terpaksa cipta perasaan bangga tu sendiri kerana kebanyakkan kebenaran itu pahit....


>>>>>valid kot rasa macam ni selagi tak der rasa ujub, bangga diri...riak sebab hmm...
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Post time 22-2-2008 06:36 PM | Show all posts

hmm good point...

Originally posted by my-alja at 22-2-2008 05:40 PM


ermm....kenapa kita fokuskan pride yg hanya drp negatif side of emotion?

kalo tgk driver2 bas kat europe...they take a pride of being a driver, and they present themselves as a professiona ...

good examples: yeah it could also be positive , kan? like a driver ( ingat i kat Remy ...ahaks)..yeah they ( drivers) have taken pride in their work kan
that's why efficient.

oh ..ur interpretation ttg priden and prejudice tu macam tu well u are entitled to your own opinion...woa u have a complewx thinking....
tapi i terfikir yg miss elizabeth Bennet tu ader high ego = pride sebab tu dia ( miss eliza) silap bila dia single handedly being judgmental to Mr Darcy 's character and let her judgment being clouded by her pride. Same goes for Mr Darcy, he always think low of elizabeth bennet's familiy so dedua sama . Elizbeth develped negative sense of prejudice ( prejudice ni dah mmg  imply negatif dah , kan?) bilamana dia dihasut oleh another guy Wickham so..cam tu lah ....
bebalik pada perception...

so kat mana kita ni = conection - connection = pride = self esteem- self image - reflection - appraising evaluation of others to our characters= prejudice = perception......ke mana seterusnya Adi pendekar?
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 Author| Post time 22-2-2008 10:03 PM | Show all posts
Edited by seribulan at 15-5-2018 10:23 AM
Originally posted by mbhcsf at 22-2-2008 04:55 PM
pride and how does a pride of a person would affect his judgment on other people's prejudice? hmmm....or his/ wn prejudice...


well..Agul dear boy, where are u ? cares to chip in?


Pride colors our judgement. So, to see things clearly...pride, lust too.

Well actually the topic is about pride. Not pride and prejudices / bride and prejudices...
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 Author| Post time 22-2-2008 10:21 PM | Show all posts
When we talk about emotion, it becomes quite a task to be exact.

The first hurdle is to put into words, and then to make sure that we're talking about the same thing.

I should clarify the difference between usage of the word pride
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 Author| Post time 22-2-2008 10:41 PM | Show all posts
Edited by seribulan at 15-5-2018 10:24 AM

1. We can feel pride because of our achievement.
2. We can feel pride because of our challneges.

In the first case, we deify sucess (whatever that means lols).
In the second cases, we deify failure (or problems and challenges).

The first part is quite clear so I choose not to talk too much about it.

Regarding the second part;
The problem with most of us is that we are indoctrinated that failure is noble.
They feel that having lots of problem makes you a better person.
Some people think that suffering is divine.
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Post time 23-2-2008 01:08 AM | Show all posts

well..good point boy...

good brownie points you got there matey...How are you doing? u ok?

ur points are okay but thre some points/ issues need to be raised here:-

concerning a traumatised person or a person with PTSD  - post traumatic stress disorder or even a person say undergoing a stage of bereavement ( loss of a person either tragically or ....less so with ancipatory death ) well in these two cases, it is ver y much encouraged to let these individuals tolet everything out of their chest whenever they are ready . We ned to provide a very conducive environments for them to slowly ventilate their feelings out of the system.

Usually for a person having to experience a  bad , near death , threatening life events , talking about it will eventually  place the person on the verge of recovery a favourable prognosis / outlook really . In there lies the acceptance,  meaning she could talk / ventilate that painful, emotionally disturbing , paralysing ,painful memory out of the system then with time she will eventually  minimes the effect / but the scar will always there. This does not mean that aperson is taking pride while talking about this  let alone to feel proud of being the chosen one to dash thru it  but the fact that she is coping and reorganizing herself fairly well would be a plus point . in addition to the well trained ears of the experts this  is a good sign to  probe the underlying psyche.

so need to be careful there when dealing with students : differentiate Post trauma etc i .e cause is concrete with attnetion seeking behavior

on the other hand a person displaying or manisfesting a trait of deviant personality ( refer DSM IV)or ICD 10,   will, of course tend to  take  a form of pride though in their actions and the after effect,  you see, this attention seeking behaviour is partly conscious and  subconscious. The primary gain / reinforcer is the people giving  of  what would be the desired effect. Haa..it will be of help if u could browse thiS term narcisSistic, histrionic ..semua ni under personality disorder....


PRIDE in that sense is abnormal as it could lead to what i called a "learned helplessness" state.

learned = as in past tensed  = adjective bcoz it is a learnt / preconditioned behaviour that results from repetitive failure to change or  adapt or inability of a person to affect their ambience ..so ..in this case the helplessness came when the person pathologically / psychologically learnt that she just need to giving in. WHICH IS  rather imprudent way to cope  with this


so solution,
supportive  but at the same time exert some challenges. This would  be best applied by psychologist ler ni.

[ Last edited by  mbhcsf at 23-2-2008 04:08 AM ]
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Post time 23-2-2008 04:06 AM | Show all posts
Proud of having pride?? hmm..ntah never thought of that , too many wors to types for thesis ..woa..oops...this is not good ...hahaah.. i dunno...as long as we keep our feet  on the ground, not losing  perspective okay kah kot...but this feeling could never beat the feeling of kneeling down , prostration....At the end of the day , inat ni
ALLAH mahu u sujud kat dia... yes dear?

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Post time 23-2-2008 09:12 AM | Show all posts
Originally posted by Agul at 22-2-2008 10:21 PM
What we are talking about is about the pride that stops us. When we experience pride, we often want to mantain the status quo. We're protective of our past achievement. We have to keep talking about it. Because we think we can't do it anymore. Therefore, we cling and clutch to the past. We want to stop others from achievement so they won't pass us up.This is the kind of pride that can turn to be a negative feeling

...


sounds very familiar .....

sometimes when u are dealing with someone who got the title, the aura of being proud of what they are....is really yucky!....nak rasa scenario nie, cubalah bercampur gaul dgn org2 yg menggelarkan diri mereka academicians.....

ada sorang pensyarah universiti awam...kata grade A for GOD, grade B for him...and C for the students...what exactly he wants to imply?...

[ Last edited by  my-alja at 23-2-2008 09:18 AM ]
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Post time 23-2-2008 09:32 AM | Show all posts
boleh tak kata....having negative pride is associate to ur poor self-esteem?

frankly, kalo kita cakap pasal ILMU....lagi byk kita tahu, lagi kerdil rasa diri berbanding dgn ilmu tuhan yg kita tak pernah tahu dan tak ambik tahu!...jadi cemana boleh dtg pride tu?

i hv a fren, she is brilliant....graduated from prestige university fr london....one thing that i dun understand abt her(masa memula kenal)....dia takut sgt org tahu, yg dia tu tak tahu pasal sesatu benda/isu...

agaknya she is holding a pride of having a scroll from london university...but then, dia malu nak ngaku yg dia tak tahu pasal sesatu isu sebab takut org tahu dia tak pandai!....ini dah masuk konflik emosi, memang ada masalah self-esteem.....

i selalu igtkan myself...if you are gud, you are gud.....takyah masuk dlm paper n claimed...I WORK HARD EVERYDAY!

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Post time 23-2-2008 03:23 PM | Show all posts
pride = self esteemed? I beg to differ on this notion

pride is when we pat ourselves on the back for a job well done , but does that results in us having a better self esteemed then before? does achieving something makes us feel good abt ourselves? Do we need to achieve something to feel good in our shoes?

Isn't that a bit superficial to say the least?

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Post time 24-2-2008 11:24 AM | Show all posts

hmmm...that's the scenario kat sini pun jugak

Originally posted by my-alja at 23-2-2008 09:32 AM
boleh tak kata....having negative pride is associate to ur poor self-esteem?

frankly, kalo kita cakap pasal ILMU....lagi byk kita tahu, lagi kerdil rasa diri berbanding dgn ilmu tuhan yg kita  ...

Alja - ni mmg betul . Ada sesetengah kumpulan mmg like that. They are too  afraid of saying : SAYA tak TAHu sata tak faham ....ni dari kumpulan pengurusan dan profesional sampialah kepada students.So bila berada dalam stus quo macam ni, no positive learning nor quality of thinking and learning tak dapat berganjak...true i sokong u . the fear of thinking what the people might say....hahaahah..ni yg i tak suka tu..sebab it ' somehow  related to our self - concept as well.
tapikan sikap macam ni tak der atu kat Consultant of prof medicine kat UK..sebab satu neurologist from cambridge ni mmg i respect giler..tapi the way he dealt with patients i love him actually...u know...i think i suka depa layn student yg PhD pun tak tunjuk lagak , kat sini ..ya rabb...


oh i think, ur lecturer yg cakap God grade a , dia grade b tu sebab i dlaam dunia klinikal my rationale is

- dia nak tunjuk bahawa betapa dia  at and into his level pun dia tak berap mahir . As he still put God FIRST

- yg student ni C - well ahaks ..mmg mentak set dia tu macam "limiting mid set / prejudge" namapaknya dari segi context..tapi i think it 's pretty ;ogical sebab bebende macm ni student masih belajaq..
- tapi if i were u akan jAWAB balik - U cannot giving Allah a grade becoz he creates u besides his KNOWLEDGE is A CLASS BEYOND FIRST...( ambil tag,ine S'ore air;ines SIA) ahaks)
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Post time 24-2-2008 11:28 AM | Show all posts

hmm ..interesting

Originally posted by dutchy at 23-2-2008 03:23 PM
pride = self esteemed? I beg to differ on this notion

pride is when we pat ourselves on the back for a job well done , but does that results in us having a better self esteemed then before? do ...

well as superficial as it really is = that's why i think it's okay as long as we colud slot it in a proper perspective, like - a pat on the shoulders i sgood after  i dunno a good presentation but then to think i am god gift to this lonelyplanet after that would be too far  fetched but to think that it's nice and i should work harder ..it 's a proper ones... you think?
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Post time 24-2-2008 11:48 AM | Show all posts

err..

wow look at the postings/ viewers ratio??

please contribute lah ideamdear silent readers....we want to see other form of oipinions, thought ...diversity ...
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 Author| Post time 24-2-2008 10:57 PM | Show all posts
Originally posted by mbhcsf at 24-2-2008 11:24 AM

Alja - ni mmg betul . Ada sesetengah kumpulan mmg like that. They are too牋afraid of saying : SAYA tak TAHu sata tak faham ....ni dari kumpulan pengurusan dan profesional sampialah kepada stude ...


That means, all the student will not study much since they will get C anyway...
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 Author| Post time 24-2-2008 10:59 PM | Show all posts

Reply #35 mbhcsf's post

Saya rasa ramai yang nak menulis, tapi segan.

Sebenarnya tak ada apa yang nak dimalukan, lagi banyak buah fikiran lagi bagus...

Apalagi, silent reader, masuk lah...
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Post time 24-2-2008 11:59 PM | Show all posts
Originally posted by Agul at 24-2-2008 10:57 PM


That means, all the student will not study much since they will get C anyway...

hish you ni..a C is a pass already as the A is very difficult especialy when dealing with "Skill" acquiring courses ni . So if an excellent student has got the same grade as the plain Jane then well..good enough. A pass is a  great bless already in that course. Or else you ..were unable to get into the subsequent year...
hehehe...lemme  try to remember...only 2-3 got B. No one got an A.
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Post time 25-2-2008 07:51 AM | Show all posts
Originally posted by Agul at 24-2-2008 10:57 PM


That means, all the student will not study much since they will get C anyway...


hehehe....i selalu usik my hubby, if u study in m'sia..jgn haraplah nak dapat dean list memanjang

yg peliknya, mentality camni ialah local lecturer...bukan nak inspire students, nak lekehkan lagi ada...
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Post time 25-2-2008 01:05 PM | Show all posts
Good reading...

Pride

Something achieved

When we achieve a goal, we feel good about ourselves. A common part of this is feeling proud, where our self-respect and feelings of worth are boosted. In this way, our sense of identity is increased.

Pride also can be in ownership, for example in a new car, although this really is again pride in achievement - for example in having acquired the car and the status that goes with it.

Pride is greater when we have had to work hard for something, as this makes the achievement more worthwhile.

Meeting high standards
Pride is particularly useful when it helps us to maintain standards. I am proud of my professional abilities and will work hard to maintain them.

A unifying force

Pride can also be a unifying force in a group of people, such as when a team achieves a difficult challenge or lives up to its high standards. It has historically been used by leaders to encourage a depressed organization or country to feel good again.

In the negative sense, it can be used as a coercion, in the sense that you must feel proud to belong to our group. It is often used by governments to enthuse a people towards war.

Hitler, for example, used it to rally the German nation after the defeat of the first world war and the subsequent ruin. How he then used it to persuade them into terrible acts is well documented. This is an approach used by more than one politician.

Superiority

Pride in itself is not a bad thing and can be very useful for maintaining standards. However, it is named as one of the Seven Deadly Sins in recognition of its shadow side, where it ends up in my feeling overly superior to other people.

When pride becomes more extreme, we extend and enhance our feeling of achievement by comparing ourselves with others, feeling superior to them. This is where pride becomes socially undesirable and it breaks the rule that says 'we are all equal' (or at least we should pretend that this is so).

In this case, pride can be measured as the gap between what you have achieved or acquired and that of other people. Millionaires can thus be very proud people (although of course this is not necessarily the case).

The saying 'Pride goes before a fall' is an indication of how pride can lead to a self-importance that leads me to ignore risks (perhaps on the assumption that I am so superior the risks will not dare to happen to me).

So what?

Have reasonable pride yourself and beware of it going over the edge into a superiority complex.

Pumping up the other person's pride such that they cannot see what you are really doing is a surprisingly common thing. How often do we flatter other people without really meaning what we say? When we flatter others, we usually have a persuasive ulterior motive.

http://changingminds.org/explanations/emotions/pride.htm

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