“Transgender don’t conform to the societal norms. They’re nothing but an outcast and why on earth should I give them the benefit of the doubt?,” said a random member of the public.
“I fail to comprehend their unorthodox need to be different. Why can’t they just stick with their biological sex; if you’ve a penis, be a boy; if you’ve a vagina, be a girl.”
‘Why?’ – it is perhaps one of the oldest debate ever known in our society, but let’s be honest – majority of us ask that question out of spite and disdain rather than with the notion to genuinely understand why transgenderism occurs.
Not too long ago a Malaysian transgender was crowned as Miss Transgender Australia and as expected, not everyone celebrated the news with confetti and poppers.
But before news of her crowning glory broke, Harian Metro reported that a transgender, Zulkefli Mazlan, expressed his guilt for surgically removing his male reproductive system and underwent breast reconstruction surgery – after living 20 years as a woman.
Transsexuals Didn’t Wake Up One Day And Decide To Switch Genders
With the promise of anonymity Malaysian Digest spoke with a trans-man named Jo, who revealed that he became who he is today as his mother raised him as a son, rather than a daughter.
“After giving birth to four girls, my mother desperately wanted a son. She refused to accept that she was carrying another daughter when she was pregnant with me.
“She bought me male clothing, and literally the only time I dressed like a girl was in schools as I had to wear ‘baju kurung’,” Jo said. Jo was teased and bullied throughout her life and due to his mother’s obsession of wanting a son, his parents eventually divorced when he was 15 years old.
“I spent years blaming myself for their divorce because I wasn’t (born) a boy. As soon as I allocated enough cash, I underwent Gender Reassignment Surgery (GRS) – hoping that it’ll ease the guilt.”
But it didn’t – in fact Jo is no longer in touch with any of his family members, including his mother, due to his decision that contradicts his faith.
“I don’t hate my mother. But I wished she realised how her obsession has damaged me. I’m 34 years old and I’m still as confused as I was 19 years ago,” he opened up.
Although Jo has never considered reversing the outcome of the surgery out of fear, he urged parents to be present in their children’s life especially whilst growing up.
“Love your children for who they are, and don’t try to change them. Because being confused with who you are is a form of mental torture that has a detrimental effect – it can lead to suicide,” Jo advised.
While former trans-woman Sofian, on the other hand stated that, “I’m very demure and soft-spoken for a guy, so I was teased as ‘lelaki sotong’ (queer) – I was condemned and mistreated for the way I am and that hurts.”
“But the agony only intensified when people started questioning my parent’s parenting method and them as parents in general,” Sofian lamented.
He deemed his adolescent days as his “personal hell on earth” as he often questioned why he did not conform to the societal standards for males − and the more he was bullied, the more he was convinced that he is not a man.
“I care for my complexion, my skin and my appearance. I didn’t play any sports and grew fond of fashion,” recalling that both his fellow male and female classmates shunned him for his oddity.
“In the 1970s people weren’t as ‘familiar’ with LGBT as they are now, per se,” he recounts, and it wasn’t until the internet graced our shores did Sofian found his ‘remedy.’
He was 27 years old when he came to know of GRS and after thorough researches, he made the decision to fully transition into a woman – hoping that he will finally fit in with society.
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Post time 8-2-2017 10:47 AM
变色卡
