Measure Of A Man

Mansairaku

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[ Last edited by  Mansairaku at 21-12-2007 11:49 PM ]

hamizao

..when i read this topic, i thought "man" was refering to a "person" (non-gender specific).  But since the contoh here is "man" (as in male) sekali with their roles ...... I couldnt help but feel that it's a bit ..ermm ...suffocating? if sekiranya my existence hanya dinilai by "how good i perform my roles? " (how good a father?) (how good a provider?) (how good a husband?) - am i? .....sedangkan, i'm just me ......? Actually, that is what i think the saying "..measure of a man" means as oppose to "..measure of man". With regard to the man's role, I was trying to put a cap to all the good attributes a man, or if you will, a woman could have. So, a man may be measured by the person, son, husband and father he is. So it is still a very wide spectrum actually. I was attracted to today's NST news on a "woman of substance"..................as someone who epitomises the triumph of the human spirit over adversaries and at the same time reaches out to the less fortunate. Could that be a measure for a man as well? Apalah yang Hami bebelkan malam2 ni??

Mansairaku

Originally posted by hamizao at 20-12-2007 11:44 PM
Actually, that is what i think the saying "..measure of a man" means as oppose to "..measure of man". With regard to the man's role, I was trying to put a cap to all the good attributes a man, or if you will, a woman could have. So, a man may be measured by the person, son, husband and father he is. So it is still a very wide spectrum actually.

I was attracted to today's NST news on a "woman of substance"..................as someone who epitomises the triumph of the human spirit over adversaries and at the same time reaches out to the less fortunate. Could that be a measure for a man as well?

Apalah yang Hami bebelkan malam2 ni??

erm ..I'm a bit confused?  If it is difficult to distinguish which measure is for "a man" and which is for "a woman", wouldn't it be easier for us to just deal with him/her as "a person" instead? .... :re:

mansairaku:
... or maybe my thinking too simple?  

[ Last edited by  Mansairaku at 25-12-2007 10:51 PM ]

hamizao

All are welcome to contribute their thoughts on this, really.

Nope, not difficult to distinguish measure of a man from woman...........but first there has to be the expectations or functions against which they are measured. This may vary from community to community, culture to culture.

For example, one expects a mother's love is usually undying. So how does she handle the situation whe, say, her child is struck by seer bad luck like a serious illness.

Man is expected to find his fortune first before asking for his beloved's hand in marriage, for example. Does he really do it 'like a man' or just come to an agreement with his gf to split cost and so on ....?

I hope I am not becoming more confusing!

Agul

Originally posted by hamizao at 22-12-2007 08:13 PM

Man is expected to find his fortune first before asking for his beloved's hand in marriage, for example. Does he really do it 'like a man' or just come to an agreement with his gf to split cost and so on ....?

What's your opinion on this matter?

Ideally traditional romanticism would be.. do it "like a man"...
What about post-mordern,爏pace tourist sending,  oil price hike romanticism? Do this  romanticism of yesteryear still hold much water(or oil )?

Do we create new culture or stay with the old? Choice, choice...

hamizao

I am still a romantic at heart....still love the idea of a knight in shining armour and  of being swooped off me feet and so on. However, one must remember that this is not to be taken as literal. If the role of a man in whatever setting does not change, I think the same measure would generally apply.

For example, chivalry may still be upheld in many societies but then some men still fail to hold their manners in front of women. Some would jostle the women in the queue......some go groping....while some women are just not ladylike at all! It still does not mean that culture has changed. Some culture do change with the onset of influence  from other cultures via new communication methods. But personally, I feel values do not change too fast.....you know ...things like respecting elders, responsibility towards family, manners.....they usually rather universal.

In the case of the guy looking for a wife, there is a wisdom in "doing it like a man"
For one, I do feel that if he can barely look after himself, how can he look after someone else. Sharing cost is making it too easy for him and as such the lesson may not be learned.