"i cant live without you" vs "i can move on without you"

sLapshock

blackmore, maybe kau tak faham apa yang aku maksudkan..ok let me explain again...


LOVE

My idea of love is simple.

Attraction, Acceptance and Gratefulness.

I’d be considered the biggest liar since Clinton if I were to tell you “I don’t go for looks”. I DO! A good 1st impression usually springs from the person’s superficial appearance. As much as I wouldn’t mind, I don’t expect an Angelina Jolie look-alike to come waltzing through the door as I’m not exactly a Brad Pitt myself.

As long as she has a nice personality and doesn’t look like Ursula from “The Little Mermaid”- I’m cool with it. Minimal prerequisites that sparks attraction.

Acceptance and gratefulness are 2 conjunctive aspects which I believe defines the true meaning of love. She may have some negative traits and might not necessarily indulge in the same interests as you. But you learn to accept. And be grateful.

I strongly believe that being grateful is a key factor in love. One may be strong, competent and efficient enough to move on and live WITHOUT the partner as easily as they started yet CHOOSES to stay because one LOVES her for the person she is and is grateful to have that person in one’s life.

NOT because you can’t stop thinking about her!

NOT to harp on her to make oneself feel complete!

NOT because you cant live without her!

The sort of mentality above is an extreme after effect of being in a relationship for SO long, and being SO accustomed to each other that love subconsciously morphs itself into:



NEED

This is indeed a dire extreme of what love can turn into. When the person becomes a big part of your everyday routine and you feel an affinity so immense that if the person is taken away from your life, you feel a great loss. She becomes a necessity instead of a privilege. She becomes what you NEED instead of what you WANT. Then you have defeated the purpose of being in a relationship.

In conclusion, things are best done in moderation - Even the act of loving someone. One should never indulge in too much love until it turns to need. Then both parties will want to stay together for completely SELFISH reasons. Because you cant live without each other. Because living without her will leave you in a calamitous mess.

Then you didn’t really love each other in the 1st place.

What you want may not always be what you need.

You will want to be LOVED.

blackmore

Originally posted by sLapshock at 29-11-2007 14:49
blackmore, maybe kau tak faham apa yang aku maksudkan..ok let me explain again...


LOVE

My idea of love is simple.

Attraction, Acceptance and Gratefulness.

I抎 be considered  ...

redsinner

the best thing about love is both COMPLEMENT each other.

it is never about a person, it is always in pair.

so, my answer would be both, because you have to balance your life and make sure both are satisfied although we know that human can NEVER be satisfied. do the best to COMPLEMENT each other. instead of letting miracles happen, lets make our own miracles...

iu78

Originally posted by hitamputih at 29-11-2007 02:08 PM

nice....!
citerlah sikit
leh wat pedoman!

nothing new ... rasanya semua org bercinta akan go thru the same thing. aku dulu pikir, kalau org bercinta dah break up mesti benci membenci. aku dulu break ngan xbf aku tu pun bukan dgn cara baik, it was terrible...

tapi masa 'time off' tu aku baru paham konsep walaupun tak bersama, kalau ko sayang dia, ko tetap akan sayang dia mcm dulu. walaupun mungkin dia dah bersama orang lain ke... tapi ni pun akan menghalang ko dari belajar menyayangi org lain jugak. aku also realized, kalau lagi cuba membenci, lagi tak bahagia until aku mula boleh accept that 3 tahun bersama dia dulu ialah antara time aku paling bahagia dalam hidup, 3 tahun tu dia mmg telah membahagiakan aku.
and despite apa org lain akan kata, suruh go on carik la yg lain etc, aku believe aku lebih kenal dia dari org lain, so aku diam2 menyayangi dia [maybe ada org akan kata aku in denial la..]. Aku rasa time break off ialah time paling vulnerable, mmg ko akan nak dgr apa org lain ckp- 'he doesnt deserve u, he's ni he's tu...' tapi botton line, u know him better than anyone.

aku pun realized time kita break off ni, bukan untuk kita tau samada kita nak ke orang mcm dia tu jadik pasangan hidup kita tapi lebih kepada, kita ni, diri kita sendiri nak tak jadik pasangan hidup dia [sorry aku ni ckp meleret2 pusing sana sini... maklumlah pagi lagi..].

selepas beberapa bulan break aku jumpa balik xbf aku. we started where we left off dulu, tapi main reason sebab aku dan dia walaupun break dgn keadaan yg teruk, kami tak benci dan tak dendam satu sama lain, and dia pun sayang aku kot walaupun tak bersama ...
masing2 pun tak berubah hati, tak carik pengganti, so we decided lebih baik kami tunang terus and tak lama pastu kawin .
mungkin takleh apply kat semua org yg ko sayang la kan hehehe.. mungkin kalau cinta agung ko ke hehehe.. kalau cinta monyet takde la.