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Author: Rayyan01

Hubungan Makin Hambar Menjelang Perkahwinan UPDATE: Pertunangan dah berakhir.

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 Author| Post time 8-8-2017 11:46 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
hanna88 replied at 8-8-2017 11:30 PM
Dejavu sangat.. Ingat kan ni thread lagi satu pasei tunang jugak.. Cite lebeh kurang same.. Ape yg i ...

Hai. Again saya nak bgtau. This is not about dia berdikari and saya nak dia  jadi manja dgn sy  ke apa. No. Saya dh explain kat atas2, she's NOT an independent woman. Langsung tak.. Dia perlukan org sekeliling tolong dia all the time. Nak beli brg ke nak byr bil ke, nak tukar simkad ke nak tukar tayar ke even nak isi angin tayar kereta pun she needs help. The problem is, sy ni berfungsi and dianggap as tunang hanya bila diperlukan utk urusan2 di atas termasuk la kalau dia tiba2 tgh malam teringin nak makan burger ke nak minun air kopi starbucks ke or bulan puasa nak sy belikan sahur ke and hantar dkt rumah dia ke, thats the time yg dia nampak sy ni as tunang dia. Other than that, sy ni mcm tak wujud and tak diperlukan. Bukan la sy kata nak dia all the time, 24/7 kena cari saya tak, i just need to be treated like a fiancee rather than a helper or some delivery guy to her.. That's all.. Why boleh call and borak hari2 dgn kawan dia keluar hangout lepas kerja dgn kwn termasuk lelaki tp dgn sy dia xnak and xboleh sbb dia kata semua tu merimaskan and buang masa?? Sy xkata dia curang tp what makes his guy friend more deserve to be treated and receive her attention more than saya yg so called his tunang ni? Btw, tq for ur adivice. mmg sy masih syg kan dia and i always hope that mmg masih ada harapan utk kami..
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Post time 8-8-2017 11:50 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Rayyan01 replied at 8-8-2017 03:46 PM
Hai. Again saya nak bgtau. This is not about dia berdikari and saya nak dia  jadi manja dgn sy  ke ...


Iols x kata pun ko nak curang adoi..iols baca k ko kata x de perasaan pun kat kawan pompuan tu.. Dan pasal tunang ko dengan kawan laki tu pun iols x de kate dia curang jugak.. pasal berdikari tu..iols hanya bagi pendapat..
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Post time 8-8-2017 11:52 PM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Rayyan01 replied at 8-8-2017 11:30 PM
Haha saya xkisah nak dilahar if mmg patut saya dilahar tapi xbestla just throw random accusations  ...

Maknanya kalo ko wasap/call hari2 dia xangkat/xreply ? Or dia dah warning awal2 jgn wassap/call?

Tak pun tunang ko saje kot layan ko mcm tu.darah manis katakan.nt klau asyik berkepit je kurang seri pengantin gitu.

Oh my .pndai nau aku nsht org.pdhl diri sendiri ..sedih
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Post time 9-8-2017 12:03 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
orgnye baik, baik dgn parents bro lg, bukab jenis berpeleseran, ok le tu. dlm fasa bertunang, ak rase die tgh nak baiki diri, nak jaga adab sbb tu die mcm tu agaknya, bukannye mencurang kot
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Post time 9-8-2017 12:07 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Gaya penulisan TT mcm dr seorg ppuan..
Hmmmmm...
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Post time 9-8-2017 12:10 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Banyaknya masalah pasal tunang skrg ni.. ramai lelaki lak tu.. perempuan anak orka sume perangai sama ke.. aiol bkn anak orka jd tatau lak

Dugaan bertunang ni.. org tua2 kata darah manis.. bersabar lah ye tt kalau msh syg tunang tu..

Tp aiol pun pelik napa tunang tu tak nak msg or call tt slalu.. igtkan org tgh bercinta bertunang nak kahwin ni kalau boleh bercontact sepanjang masa..mgkn dia spesis yg rare
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Post time 9-8-2017 12:14 AM | Show all posts
Edited by mbhcsf at 9-8-2017 12:17 AM
Rayyan01 replied at 8-8-2017 11:46 PM
Hai. Again saya nak bgtau. This is not about dia berdikari and saya nak dia  jadi manja dgn sy  ke ...

awk decide nak menikah dengan dia kan....so

so sekarang ni kalau algorithm pemikiran awak nak ke arah membina masjid tu try cari jalan secreative mungkin atau talk to a counselor  ade je yg bertauiliah contact them privately macam mana nak taclle the problem kot


sekali lagii tak faham - persmaan kedua kes study ni ialah
semua baru nak mula kerjaya dan famili suruh menikah - dan bila belum stable? ada isu yg akan timbul macam kesediaan memnyediakan benda yg sepatutnya etc etc.terasa autonomy tercabar , self concept being challenged...


u rasa kalau given more time when say you turned to 45 or 39 years or 35  adaah masa tu you rasa you akan stable financially and maalah remeh begini tak timbul dengan tunang yg sama  atau dengan wanita yg you tahu apa yg you nak dan ciri mana you nak?
i tatau nak kata apa actually sebab dedua ni ditakdirkan wanita suka depa ...not that depa mencari wanita dan tersuka...??? kan? ya ka? then ade lah sikit adjustment

just curious tak ada kena mengena dengan kes TT.

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 Author| Post time 9-8-2017 12:18 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Jeniechan replied at 8-8-2017 11:52 PM
Maknanya kalo ko wasap/call hari2 dia xangkat/xreply ? Or dia dah warning awal2 jgn wassap/call?
...

Siap warning awal2 la haha and if saya call jugak or whatsapp dia akan ignore and marah balik haha

Haha betul la tu sy pun mmg selalu sedapkan hati saya ckp  mcm tu haga dia nak jaga seri pengantin la, dia xnak jd bosan la and few other reasons that i could think of hehe hanya itu yg mampu sy fikir utk bertahan selama ni hehe

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 Author| Post time 9-8-2017 12:21 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
felinecat replied at 9-8-2017 12:03 AM
orgnye baik, baik dgn parents bro lg, bukab jenis berpeleseran, ok le tu. dlm fasa bertunang, ak ras ...

Maybela kot. Dia tgh menjaga adab2 semasa bertunang. Saya mmg tak tuduh dia curang pun.. Setakat msg dgn kwn2 lelaki tu pn sy anggap normal. Saya xkisah pun just terfikir2 dgn tunang sendiri xboleh but dgn kwn ok pulak kan haha takpela sy mmg selalu berhusnuzon je dgn dia
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 Author| Post time 9-8-2017 12:22 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
AyaqMeloSuam replied at 9-8-2017 12:07 AM
Gaya penulisan TT mcm dr seorg ppuan..
Hmmmmm...

Macam perempuan ke? Hahaha yg pasti sy bukan kunyit atau spesies bang sajat ya hehe
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 Author| Post time 9-8-2017 12:27 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
hdon replied at 9-8-2017 12:10 AM
Banyaknya masalah pasal tunang skrg ni.. ramai lelaki lak tu.. perempuan anak orka sume perangai sam ...

Itulah yg buat saya pun pelik and musykil jugak haha maybe mcm forummer kat sini kata, dia tgh menjaga adab2 semasa bertunang so jauhi tunang anda selagi belum menikah tapi dekatilah kawan2 lelaki anda kerana mereka bukan tunang anda hahaha. agaknya mcm awk cakap kot dia mmg species yg rare haha. The very good explanation sy boleh come out is maybe kwn2 lelaki yg dia xde masalah utk bercontact selalu tu is bukan betul2 lelaki. Hehe wallahualam  hehe
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Post time 9-8-2017 12:32 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Rayyan01 replied at 8-8-2017 11:46 PM
Hai. Again saya nak bgtau. This is not about dia berdikari and saya nak dia  jadi manja dgn sy  ke ...

Bagus betul tunang mcm ni..i dulu kalo lapar jgn harap la tunang nk dtg hantar makanan.. apatah lagi nak beli makanan sahur.. hehe... tapi i tunang kejap je dlm sebulan lebih je... bila dah nikah baru lah dia layan selayaknya bagi seorang isteri.. apa kata u duduk bincang apa yg x puas hati dgn dia.. maybe dia x sedar kot perbuatan dia yg u x suka
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 Author| Post time 9-8-2017 12:38 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
mbhcsf replied at 9-8-2017 12:14 AM
awk decide nak menikah dengan dia kan....so

so sekarang ni kalau algorithm pemikiran awak nak k ...

Yes. Mmg ada planning nak discuss between each other first kalau ada apa2 yg xpuas hati ke or terbuku selama ni but like i said, she refused. She didnt want to accept that our rship is on the rocks and she still said there's nothing wrong with our rship. Then how can I know whats the real problem as to why she acted like this towards me when she clearly refused to cooperate and solve this thing together?  Tq for ur suggestion. I pun rasa mcm i need to go and talk to a councellor on how to solve this matter..
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 Author| Post time 9-8-2017 12:43 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
Naatasha replied at 9-8-2017 12:32 AM
Bagus betul tunang mcm ni..i dulu kalo lapar jgn harap la tunang nk dtg hantar makanan.. apatah la ...

Haha lain org lain cara dia kot.. Tahniah sbb selamat bernikah and bahagia dgn en suami hehe

Sy dh cuba banyak kali pun ajak berbincang benda ni but dia mmg refuse. Every single time dia akan ckp there's nothing wrong with our rship so no need to bincang ke discuss ke apa2 buang masa je. So nak cakap apa lagi kan? Haha bersabar dan bertabahla jela jawabnya hehe
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Post time 9-8-2017 01:11 AM | Show all posts
alieyrina replied at 8-8-2017 05:27 AM
Hari tebiat tunang sedunia ka bulan nii...aku blum baca lg yg ni..

Hahaha..gelak i baca komen you.
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Post time 9-8-2017 01:51 AM From the mobile phone | Show all posts
1. Tahniah dpt beli rumah sendiri. Takpe duduk rumah inlaw bg. Rumah sendiri sewakan. Duit rumah sewa simpan utk depo rumah lg 1. Awas: belajar ilmu hartanah drpd guru yg betul
2. Cari juga masa utk bncang hati ke hati kenapa tunang layan mcm tu. Ke dia jenis tk nk sweet2 sebelum kahwin?
3. Bersyukurlah bakal keluarga mertua walau orka tp x menyombong. Hubungan dgn inlaws kena baik juga
4. Bagus tindakan tk contact kwn perempuan tu. Make it clear to her , bro tk berminat nk ada special relationship  dgn dia.
5. Pasal persediaan kawin,  biasa lah org pmpuan nk uruskan. Tp jgn plak bila dia nk settlekan semua, bro x ambil tahu lgsg.
6. Doa la byk2 semoga dipermudahkan
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Post time 9-8-2017 08:36 AM | Show all posts

Assalammu'alaikum TT.

Ok.  Baru nmpk.  Now you feel extremely uncomfortable because her super rich family starts to membelakangi your family.  Ok, faham.  Harap2 ur fiance pun bukan jenis... you know... my-personal-vanity-is-fulfilled-since-the-charming-geek-n-out-of-reach-cool-guy-is-practically-mine- but-I-better-keep-him-because-he-might-be-of-some use-to-me.

Kau buatlah secepat mungkin heart to heart discussion dgn dia.  Sbbkan dia spesis enggang yg susah pulak diajak berbincang, kau ugut je la nak putus tunang.  Baru dia setuju berbincang agaknya.  If you survive the talk, try to make a bargain with her parents.    If both parties are unable to come to an agreement, well, the ball is in your court, son.  

Buatlah istikharah, semoga Allah tunjukkan jalan.
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Post time 9-8-2017 08:42 AM | Show all posts
Rayyan01 replied at 8-8-2017 10:06 PM
Hai. Saya tak pasti sis ada baca betul2 atau x saya ada reply dekat atas2 ni. Saya bukan la mengad ...

dek, u kena faham..tugas tak berbayar weols kat sini adalah baca & bagi nasihat if any..we can only help you see things differently, or highlight for any of your wrongdoings..
apa yang you boleh improve or tolerate, tu je yang weols boleh point out kat sini..
kita tak kenal your tunang & based on the limited info tak nampak tunang you salah, so weols takleh nak bash the girl..
yes, dia sibuk wasap colleagues dia tapi we don't know if she meant anything by it..

sini bukan fb, yang pengomen acah2 good2 cool2 nak dapat likes..
here is anon, so basically what we say is what we meant..
bukan simply nak bash you..
kalau you simply nak "pendapat" in the context of "saya doakan awak", you should change the thread title..
bukan I tak baca, I read your long essay before I dropped my comment here & I believed most of the forumer here did..

so dek, senang cita gini la, kalau uols rasa your side memang tak salah & tak boleh nak tolerate dengan her attitude..
talk to her & sort things out..
cakap yang this is a big issue for you & need to be settled or else you cannot proceed to the next level..
sayang tu memang sayang tapi kalau you tak boleh nak accept cara dia, camne nak hidup bersama for another 30-40 years..
both of you are not being fair to each other, so why proceed?
& kalau dia ada orang lain or sudah tawar hati ke, ask her to come clean..
if you expect a flawless / perfection from her, tell her so..
you kena lay out everything sebab soal hati ni orang lain tak boleh baca..
kalau you cerita kat sini, weols akan suggest improvements on your side jela..sebab bukan your girl yang bukak benang sini..
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Post time 9-8-2017 08:48 AM | Show all posts
Kesiannya makcik nengok hang ni
Soal emosi memang susah nak banding soal harta
Orka ni semua perangai gini ke?
Jaga status, ketepikan perasaan orang lain, pentingkan diri , oh my goodness...

Tt, satu ja nak pesan
Bila dah kahwin nanti, jangan sampai bini tak hormat famili tt
Jangan sampai famili tt dipinggirkan sebab dah nampak ciri2 tu
Last but not least, tt sendiri jangan pinggirkan famili especially ibu bila dah nikah dgn orka perangai gini
Takut nanti segalanya dikontrol.

Apa pun, tt kena tegas la
Jangan duk ikuuuut ja cakap tunang tu
Btw, tahniah ya, selamat pengantin baru in advance dari makcik

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Post time 9-8-2017 08:51 AM | Show all posts
oh, I lupa nak point out satu isu...
masalah relationship JANGAN sekali kali discuss dengan different gender..
sebab tu orang kata hal kelambu jangan bawak keluar..
banyak pihak yang akan terluka akhirnya..
kesian kawan tu, dah terjatuh hati dengan tunang orang..
memang tt cakap takde niat pun, sekadar berkongsi masalah sesama kawan korang pun ada buat kan..
ya I pun ada kawan lelaki yang berwasap..tapi not to the extend untuk berkongsi masalah peribadi..
bergosip pasal orang lain ada or cerita masalah kerja, politik & kutuk the bosses..
tapi bukan masalah hubungan dengan partner memasing..
never cross the line..
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